I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
