i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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