so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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