I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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