He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
