He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
