Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
