i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
