It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
