I'm really into asian looking animals
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
