Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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