To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Randomize
