So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
