What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
