I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm like, not good at living.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
