it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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