if you like me you must not know who I am
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
