Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize