I could have mohawked her pubes.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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