Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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