But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
