everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
