why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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