i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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