He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
