is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
