Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
