Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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