My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
