Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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