WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
