i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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