I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
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