My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
