Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Randomize
