I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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