K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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