well most of my day revolves around power hour
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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