Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
