so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
