I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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