I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
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