At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Randomize
