I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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