Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Randomize
