Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
