Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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