there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
