I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
