the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize